Genie Espinosa

0:00 [Applause]

0:05 hello I'm sposa I'm an illustrator my comic Artis from Barcelona I just want to talk you about my career basically but very very quickly I've been a freelancer for the past 12 going to 13 years. And I actually started illustrating Children books and I spent like six years doing that the fact that I didn't finish my illustration degree degree will leave because I didn't was I didn't really like it I was in the head space to do so created a lot of pressure on me.

0:34 So I started over compensating just by working a lot a lot like many many hours every every day and I think it was to cover that lack lack of knowledge I think that I had so that end up of me getting really really burnt out.

0:53 So I had to rethink what to do and what I thought was oh I'm just going to give my CB to Starbucks because I can't really face working on this anymore but what I actually did was starting to make comics you can see here in the screen like two of my graphic novels the ton Blanco is the great white it's about this character going through a path of grief and how this transforms her life.

1:21 But the first one I did Hoops was a Spanish publisher just called me saying oh I like what your SC what you're doing can you just do you have an idea of something that we can do together.

1:35 And I did have this idea and Hoops blown out. Basically in a reality it's like an Utopia in a reality where men doesn't exist these three characters high schoolers they they don't care they are very very happy about it and they go after a class just to smoke a little bit of marijuana and then they fall into a war hole and they appear in another dimension when they get transformed as you can see in that panel over there.

2:04 So this comic was so well welcome that all of a sudden I found myself from being behind a screen of a computer just old H just old cranky and all dirty why I'm not going to say it eh just to be able just go into the hairdresser getting dress up going to Telly and to radio and I won two Awards because of that comic the best emerging artist in 2021 on the comic conon in Barcelona and the best comic of 2021 as well so as you can see I had just to pumer myself up. So it was really really cool it also got me to this exhibition in the cccv H of Barcelona which is the Museum of contempor Contemporary Art. And I was selected alongside eight other female comic artist of the whole Spain to have this exhibition during six months of it's like the best experimental Comics that. There was so imagine I was like blown away and my exhibition had this part that was really cool that was picked up from this comic I did for a newspaper also exploring my Comics are not like Square panels like I like to talk about movement in a different kind of way.

3:20 So in this case there were these circles were the panels of this comic and in the exhibition when you came out of this tube that will transform me you this was this inflatable 3 meter inflatable waiting for you. So it was overlooking at you and telling you that like yeah you can do it you are powerful as well so meanwhile all these other things were happening I was working with amazazing companies doing great projects with Coca-Cola with Amazon I did a Google doodle but it was always something that is being like being a little bit annoying in my back like making me feel a little bit of weight and it's the Imposter syndrome. And I'm sure you all all or almost all can relate to that it's like feeling so small. And it's like the constant exposure that you get and so many beautiful and amazing artwork in your fingertips constantly and I felt really really lost and I think my mental health took a a heart like a heart blown on that.

4:27 So I think that's why I draw this be characters because I think for me they act like pillars because they don't move and they stand there and they tell you that do you belong with them too so when mental health is really really bad for me I think this imposter syndrome it finds spots and and ways to move around and really go big big as well. And I found out that the only way I can cope with it is continue working so when I I illustrate either for clients or for p experimentation I like to explore feelings that are not usually or conventionally just put over there I talk about my concerns and I talk about this not very well said but weaknesses and I try to normalize them I think about the beauty of being honest honest and transparent with my communication it can really reach to anybody who is looking at my artwork.

5:23 And I like I really like to make the ordinary the main point and I also like to validate all these emotions it's such a joy for me when I have this call of a client and they ask me to illustrate an article and an editorial and it when it really resonates with me. And I can just go and dig in and then explore the topic and then add some layers that maybe you can see at the first round that you see but if for example the article talks about why I don't feel like why my partner doesn't give me any pleasure and that you put like a little bit of a sad face in an underpant I think it's like something really cute that maybe you can't see at the first glance but then it's there.

6:04 I think everything adds a little bit of layers and add some richness and also exploration leads me to try just to try Fon or drawing H typography which is one of the my favorite things to do and I think any graphic design designer can kill me because of the reason of the things that are saying but I think it really adds something extra to my illust ations and it's something that I really really like to do another of my favorite things is being able to draw powerful not objectified and nonnormative women women that belong and occupy a space and are not sorry or asking permission to do it I think that working like this and drawing them helps me to create a safe space where I feel I belong with them too. And I can be calm and I and I can be H relaxed and I hope that the person who is looking at my work can feel the same thing too in moments of struggle with impostor syndrome and loads of anxiety I can feel I belong there.

7:10 And I'm protected and safe because they are kind of guarding me in a way these women that I draw don't always have to be very energetic or dynamic they can just be taking a rest or hoping for something new and better to come or just be very soft and cuddly and just be be like very round and breastfeeding the new baby also when I find myself in the spiral of dark thought I think I need to stop and really be honest I just can't do things without just piing what's happening because I think I need the client or the person who is seeing my work to really understand what's happening and I like to talk about the insecurities and let them exist so they are real and I think I I won't be able to choose something else that is not being honest so I wouldn't take any jobs that don't go with what I think or I don't agree with like I wouldn't I wouldn't do something that I'm not happy about I think this honesty is what really makes really important what I do to me and also in my work there's always some kind of ftiness so the characters can be notu the but always like having a little bit of fun are they are characters that speak the truth but at the same time they won't hesitate to grab your hand and take you out of the comfort zone just little by little so it give you a little bit of comfort so it's great I think it's great to connect with projects that speak my language and fortunately I also have a team of agents that are amazing that are here as well I don't know where and that will give me support when I just go oh I'm really really struggling and they help me to move forward in rough times which I think it's like I'm very fortunate and yeah I do really because sometimes you know I dream about seeing all my work in huge massive windows and getting this super sporty clothes like very very cool and I like to connect with the client in a deeper level that is not just something aesthetic or something like like a flat layer of it. And so I want them to be trustful and and contact me to do some chunky characters that have a little bit of attitude for them.

9:39 So I also have I don't think I have like a checklist of things that I would like to do because I learned after this years that the best thing of this job is always about to come in the next email so it's like a great surprise every time well I think in rough times is also very important to be honest and communicate and communicate to me illustration is communication is the only thing it's important about just connections create links and connections and sometimes because of that and the overwork and the burnout I sto myself a bit and also the impostor syndrome sometimes has punched me really really hard in the face so I had to stop and take a bit a little bit of a breather.

10:27 And I try to relax but at the same time it's not how I am and after therapy doing some therapy I found out that it's not the way I work.

10:35 So I think I will sometimes have a little bit of a rest but it's better if if I say that is better if when you find yourself in a situation that you are struggling it's better just to be honest and communicate because being ourselves and just poor everything that we have in is what really makes us really unique and I I think that's is what really is about. And it's our real superpower that's it thank you so much